The error of your ways...

I was working on a particular negotiation recently. With a third party who was supposed to be an asset but behaved more like the opposing side. A little too opposing if you will. Lots and lots of chatter about all they can accomplish. But not a great deal of actual accomplishment.

Here is a good example of when you should not be a dumbarse.

This group is holding a press conference regarding a certain topic that directly impacts us and our client. We want to know who from the media is being invited. I get this answer "Many important media representatives."

hmmmm. I would love to spend all afternoon McGyver-like with my lipstick case, a can of Pringles, and my Magic 8 Ball trying to extract meaning from that meaningless response but I lack the time.

This is what is called We don't have the information but will attempt to bluff. Or what I also like to call Misrepresenting leverage.

I email back: Can you provide the specific names of the "important media representatives?"

The reply I receive lists some real media entities but not the actual names of the people from those organizations. Like CNN. I am certain there are more than a thousand people working there and since you are the one inviting the media, we both know you need a name to do so. You would therefore have that name on a list. Also, this is information our team needs to have and is normally given quite promptly.

I follow up again.

I get this : We will try to find that information for you.

This irritates me in myriad ways.

1. You invited them and are telling the client about your grand experience in media coverage. Demonstrate your grand abilities by giving specifics. Why are you not giving specifics? Because you do not have actual names. You have pretend names and believe me John Cocktoasten does not sound credible on paper.

2. You will try to find this information? It's not a treasure hunt. A good place to look? ON YOUR COMPUTER. The same one you are emailing me from. At least if you have to stall do it the smart way and say " I am in meetings offsite the rest of the day and will get to you when I am back in the office" I don't know your schedule so I won't know your lying. Yet.

So I send a direct response indicating that we are happy to reach out to CNN directly since we have worked closely with them in the past.

I get an email back that was clearly NOT intended to go to me but to everyone else on their side of the table. Enjoy explaining that to your boss, who was also copied on the email. The email you accidentally copied me on. The one to which I replied TO ALL, "Are you sure you meant to copy me on this?"

Here is a tip: Your first day on the job learn the importance of the REPLY ALL function and that you should NEVER NEVER use it when you are about to talk some sh*t about someone ALSO COPIED ON THE EMAIL.