Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Pour yourself some sex kitten

Red wine has long been considered heart-healthy. With its antioxidants, flavonoids, and resveratrol, a glass of red wine a day is believed to reduce the risk of coronary heart disease and improve overall cardiovascular health. And of course, a glass of red wine is a great counterbalance to the endless chores you had to do all day.

But wait, there is more.  According to The Journal of Sexual Medicine, women who drink red wine get frisky more often than woman who drink other types of alcohol or do not drink at all. The study involved over 800 women and the verdict was women who drink up to two glasses of red wine a day are more likely to unleash their inner vixen. 

This makes perfect sense. Red wine is luxurious and decadent, isn't it? 

White wine, oh you taste good in the summer, but too much of you just gives a headache.  And  too much beer, well, that will cause you to paint your team name on your naked chest and yell things like "Freebird" for no reason. 

Two glasses of vodka? You aren't getting frisky but will likely end up with perfect pics of you wearing a french maid costume and later petting the toilet like a puppy.

Too many gin martinis, have fun doing karaoke. And not well either. And not a song that everyone will know and like such as Baby Got Back or Margaritaville but something like Total Eclipse of the Heart. Which you weep during. 

And scotch? Enjoy too much Scotch and you'll be Sean Connery. With the same slurry voice only less sexy and not sophisticated.

And Tequila. Well, we all know Tequila translates into havoc and turmoil. And vomit. And waking up naked in someone's lawn in just your cowboy boots. (Remember when you did this, D?) And discovering the next day you shouted at policemen. And drunk dialed 50 people. And put your bare arse on Facebook. 

So red wine, you classy miss, you are really just helping us tap that central hellcat reserve. Now, I know some of you don't drink. And you might be rambunctious enough all on your own. But for the rest of you, pour that red love story and get your frisky on.  

My Husband clearly knew this scientific finding already hence the reason our house is constantly stocked with cases of red wine. And all this time I thought his intent was to help me maintain a happy and healthy heart. 

I will keep that in mind tonight. Happy St. Pats if you are celebrating. JohnnyMac has planned a surprise weekend getaway for us so I will be MIA until Monday. Red wine anyone? Meow.

Have a fabulous long weekend. I am quite sure I will. 

135 comments:

Jules said...

Aren't you supposed to drink GREEN wine just for today???

Have a great weekend!

Dumbwit Tellher said...

Jenny - standing naked in someone's yard only wearing cowboy boots? Sounds like a personal experience. Well my friend, last Oct. I decided to live life to the fullest (ahh..huh) and take on my fellow man with their shots of tequila. Well I ended up jumping in the hosts pool party clothes on and all. My in-laws were there too visiting from Scotland. The hostess was kind enough to snap pics & her son graced his FB page with them. Tequila NEVER AGAIN.
Happy St. Paddy's Day and enjoy your red wine = frisky weekend.
Sláinte xx

Ellie said...

I was just looking at a certain dusty bottle... and you've given me a perfect reason to open it. Purrrfect? Enjoy your weekend.

Brian Miller said...

off to get some wine...you know..smiles.

The Warrior in ME said...

Haha! Carry all the red wine you can! Hope your weekend turns out super fun :)

p.s. bare arse on facebook made me laugh out LOUD.

Simone said...

Thanks for the advice JennyMac.....I very rarely drink red wine....which explains a lot quite frankly. I may have to remedy that.

Love the vodka, beer and tequila descriptions....very funny!!

Have a wonderful week-end getaway :)

Mrsblogalot said...

Meow is right!!!

Is it too early to start now? It must be night time somewhere right?

Have a great weekend!

CambridgeLady said...

Oooh it might get you frisky .... but I always get the worst hangovers on red wine. White for me, or as it's St Paddy's - maybe a Bailey's Irish Cream :o)

Shorty said...

I'm completely envious of your long weekend! But, I think I can pick up a nice bottle of red tonight.... maybe we'll have some stories to swap by Monday!

Have a wonderful trip!

leigh said...

Have fun!

Total Eclipse of the Heart is totally my kareoki jam. I might have cried once or twice during a solo.

Mary K Brennan said...

Enjoy your weekend. Cheers!

the walking man said...

Travel well and JohnnyM don't forget to throw a case of red in the backseat.

Slamdunk said...

Enjoy your time away.

Emily said...

A weekend getaway!? FUN!
Unfortunately, I'm not a red wine fan. I just don't like the taste of most of them...I'm more a white wine person. Kind of weird that I don't like red considering my vampire obsession.

mbkatc230 said...

I've yet to find a red that I really like. Guess I need to keep trying :) Your descriptions of the various alcohol side effects should be mandatory on all labels - kind of like a JennyMac General's Warning! Have a wonderful weekend, hope you go somewhere fun, sunny and warm! Kat

brainella said...

Surprise weekend? Nice. Do you have to take your own wine?

Tracie said...

Have I ever blogged about my FIL's wife who only drinks red wine (and quite a bit of it, too). This explains so much so much. *shudders*

Eric said...

Red wine? So you are saying that it will be like the old beer commercials where when pouring out the red wine in an empty warehouse, gorgeous women appear magically? Awesome!

Have a great weekend!

♥ Braja said...

I can't help it. It's a favorite. I *do* love red wine :)

♥ Braja said...

...and it's in writing in several places on my blog and elsewhere how I'll barter any kind of service or advice for red wine. Christ, what a slut....

Kaela said...

Damnit! I used to relish a glass of red wine, but I discovered they were largely contributing to my migraine issues. I had to force myself to liking white. Pouty face.

Kaela said...

Damnit! I used to relish a glass of red wine, but I discovered they were largely contributing to my migraine issues. I had to force myself to liking white. Pouty face.

Simply Suthern said...

The wife hates wine and beer. I have never found a wine I like. Well the ole Boones Farm back in the 80's wern't too bad. I guess I will have to depend on the ole charm this weekend. Oh well I'm screwed, Or not. Enjoy the Vino and the weekend.

MommyLovesStilettos said...

Hmm I don't drink red wine. I prefer white wines....

and I have no problem getting frisky. LOL

T!nK said...

rawr! my favorite part of St. Patty's day is soda bread. Sexy, I know.

The Boob Nazi said...

You keep providing me with excellent reasons not to drink. I hope you have a great weekend!

Secretia said...

He's a clever man all right :)

Scraps said...

All too true!

We just picked up a few more bottles of red (and one of white, gotta have the occasional one, I suppose) Monday after a tour of Lakeridge Winery in Central Florida. Thinking one might get opened this weekend!

Fav red of the moment is just about an Pinot Noir, bonus points for imports!

Yankee Girl said...

Red wine is my fave.

I had to give up tequila for various reasons, so red wine it is!

Enjoy your weekend!

Michael Rivers said...

Happy St. Pat's Day to you too!

Joann Mannix said...

Thanks for your kind words on my blog and oh, how I have found a soul sister.

My husband and I are serious wine collectors. Like roll your eyes into the back of your head if you get us started on wine. We have a wine cellar and we try to get to the Homeland--God's country-- Northern California-- at least 2-3 times a year.

Red wine is the Helen Mirren of the spirits world. So luxurious, so lovely as it ages, so above and beyond its peers.

If you're ever in your neighbor state of Florida, come on over. We like to share our finest. Have a fantabulous weekend. Erin Go Bragh!

darsden said...

I handle just about any drink... except wine...my ears glow red after a half of glass and by the end of that glass I am down for the count. "My kyptonite"

Kelly Marie said...

hahaha! I love all the references of the actions coming from certain liquors. My favorites were the beer and the scotch!! Oh how I love reading your blog (:

The Divorcee said...

Hilarious post and couldn't agree more. Bottoms up and have fabulous trip!

mama-face said...

I don't drink...but I could use that red wine if you know what I mean.

Enjoy. Sounds like you will.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

You get a surprise!! Is he bringing you to live with me??

Bossy Betty said...

Have a wonderful weekend! I suspect it will involve red wine...

Dumblond said...

What about whiskey? Oooh I could tell you some stories about that one...
And the whole red wine thing...please say this is not the reason why my parents are now a couple of winos. Pleasepleaseplease...

M-Cat said...

If my husband saw this, he would totally toss his religious beliefs aside and buy a case of red wine. Okay, not really, but the thought would flit across his mind. : )

Have a great weekend away!

The girl with the flour in her hair said...

I am a red wine girl all the way. Love the stuff. No wonder my husband is so willing to make out of his way stops at the liquor store to keep me in supply!

Have a good weekend!;)

Grand Pooba said...

I think I'm going to print this one out and hang it on my wall. LOL!

I love me some red wine!!! And thank you for giving me yet another reason to drink it.

Have a fabulous weekend Jenny!

Cheers!

(Still laughing over the naked cowboy boots dude!)

(I think I need a drink)

Mommy Lisa said...

You forgot Jagermeister and dancing on tables.

No, not me...that was some OTHER blonde.

;)

Cara Smith said...

Not just that, but when you sitting around in the living room watching TV with the kids after work, it sounds so much better (acceptable) to have a few glasses of wine. At least is seems like it would be betting than lining up the tequilla shots on the coffee table and having the kids drag my ass to bed.

Plentymorefishoutofwater said...

Thanks for the tip - I'm off to the Off License now...
*Plentymorefishoutofwater - One Man's Dating Diary*

JenJen said...

purrrrrrrr.....

Herding Cats said...

I want a surprise getaway!!! Lucky!

Aunt Becky said...

I'm a vodka kitten myself, but then again, I wouldn't mind some snaps of me in a sassy french maid costume ;)

Vivienne said...

Red wine? Yes we've met.
In fact, red wine, my hubby and I have had many a happy threesome.
:)
Have a lovely weekend!

The mad woman behind the blog said...

Meow, indeed.

Wonder if red wine is good for growing embryos?

Linda said...

Love this post! LOL, I always think of the song, Tequila makes my clothes fall off....cause yes it does and that IS from personal experience. Love wine, more of a white girl then red, but then I always like to get my frisky on! So have a GREAT weekend. Meow for sure!

Jen said...

I always knew there was a good reason for the fact that red wine is my drink of choice.

Have a fun weekend.

Housewife Bliss said...

meow meow right back at you. I adore Red, and can agree on all points..just adore the mental images your other examples bring to mind.

Christine Macdonald said...

I am naming my first child Pinot Noir. It's safe to assume I love the Grape.

Enjoy your wekend, love. xxoo

South Florida Lawyers said...

Don't forget red wine and chocolate (or "blood and chocolate" as Elvis Costello refers to it).

Too Many Hats said...

I had no idea there was a jounral of sexual medicine - sounds like a good read. Have a super getaway!

Heather@WHMB said...

Heck yeah - red wine is amazing, I am looking forward to picking up a glass (or three) post-baby. Only a few more months....

Enjoy your weekend!

DeNae said...

Well, I guess I'll have to start drinking now! Think my husband can take more of THIS than he already gets?? (insert my sexy, hot tamale profile picture here; airbrush out extra chins, please)

Kate said...

Ha ha now maybe I should rethink my vodka tonic preference.....

I want to be the sexy red wine lady

Kate xx

Pricilla said...

Enjoy your weekend away....are you packing the cases?

MommaKiss said...

Tequila is TaKillYa to me! Ouch.
And whenever I think of red wine lately, I think of the John Mayer song heartbreak warfare (or similar) and he says "red wine and ambien, just talkin sh!t again...

love it :)
have a SUPAH weekend!

Dual Mom said...

Have a fabulous weekend!

Tequila also makes one think that drinking it from a shoe is a grand idea, in the middle of a fancy restaurant, while laughing hilariously so everyone else in restaurant is watching the table full of cougars drink tequilla from a shoe. Not that I've ever done such a thing.

Mrs. Bear said...

I just might head straight for the 1/2 price bottles of red wine at the st. pattys day celebration we are attending tonight... hmmm. =0)

Erin said...

Red wine is a necessity in my house. I am glad to hear that we are not the only one's who have cases :)

Happy St. Patricks Day. No Green Beer for Me..........Just Red Wine

The Vegetable Assassin said...

The sad thing is, this is ALL TRUE!

I don't like red wine. I like the smell of it. I LOVE the idea of it. The taste? I can't love it at all. I look like I've been sucking on a lemon soaked in cleaning fluid. No, no, no. Plus it gives me a giant red face like a diseased Moon.

I like tequila a lot though. And I can actually retain my ladylikeness under its influence, despite what you might believe. OK, so it's a really unbalanced, staggering, pink-faced, sweaty lady who yells things like "I THINK MY BOOBS MIGHT BE TAKING OVER THE WORLD!" and says things like "YOU LOOK LIKE JOHN OATES!" to complete strangers and finds bar glasses in her purse next morning, but a lady nonetheless.

Aging Mommy said...

Oh! So it's the fact that I stopped drinking wine regularly after having my daughter and BF her for 15 long months that led to the much less frisky me and not the brain dead tiredness of being a new Mom? I wish someone had told me!!!!

Thank you for visiting my blog and for your comments on my post as to why I am proud to be a Mom blogger. Not sure how you found me but I am glad you did - I like you site and look forward to reading more.

drollgirl said...

ah. red wine. it is lovely, isn't it? my only problem is that i don't drink a glass every night, and when i reach for a wine bottle i tend to drink the whole damn thing.

oh. one more problem. i am sans man at the moment, so i don't have anyone to take advantage of red wine-induced friskiness. wah!

Wild and Precious said...

saw your comment on adventures of a wife and mom blog and thought I'd pop over to say hi! so glad i did!

i'd love for you to visit my blog too! I have a giveaway going on that I think you might like.

klfd.woods said...

you jennymac, forever the lady in RED!

thanks for the tip!

Enjoy the special weekend, i see many sips in your future!

HalfAsstic.com said...

Your depiction of a tequila overload was quite apt. I believe that whole naked on the lawn in cowboy boots escapade was played out in living color by yours truly, back in my college days.
Have fun with JohnnyMac on your surprise getaway!
Cheers! ;-)

Ellen said...

But...but...I don't LIKE red wine. I'm a white wine/vodka/beer...basically anything BUT red wine type of girl. However, the benefits sounds pretty sexy...I may take one for the team on this one! Here's a thank you from my boyfriend ;)

http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/

Yummy Mummy said...

Well, it is St. Patty's Day and our third Anniversary, so bring on the red wine :)

Have a great weekend!

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

That's it, I am headed to the liquor store right now :-)

Julia said...

oh god, i actually HAVE sung Total Eclipse of the Heart at Karaoke. But the drink of choice was bottomless long island ice teas (deadly) and we (there were four of us) dang the Old School version, peppered with expletives. Good times. but definitely not red wine sexy times!

A Year on the Grill said...

And here i have been doing Rum drinks all week...

any studies on rum? Seems to be working

Badass Geek said...

Wine makes women frisky? I'm going out to buy some wine, then.

Eva Gallant said...

Have a wonderful wino weekend! lol

Myya said...

Have a wonderful weekend! Hmmmm maybe another lil mac will come out of this Meow weekend : )

Nat said...

Red wine is definitely my tipple of choice...

Enjoy the weekend...wine and all!

Mighty M said...

My husband keeps us STOCKED in red wine. It overflows the wine fridge and hides in our guest room closet.

Now I think I know why.

I am totally with you on all the ill-effects of the other alcohols. Red wine is usually my drink du jour. And by du jour, I mean almost every du jour! :)

But I CAN'T say it makes me frisky, I think in my house it just works on men.

Have fun this weekend!

Leah Rubin said...

I'll drink to that! This is good news, and I love your analysis of the alcohols and their effects. I'd say you were spot on!

Have a great time on your weekend away! We'll miss you, but look forward to hearing from you next week.

Intense Guy said...

Have a great weekend!

I'll to stick to wine coolers myself. I don't need "more frisky" in any event.

I mean... no one would wanna see me reproduce (even accidently).

foxy said...

This explains a TON. I am a red wine LOVER. :)

Cheers to you, JM!

Karls said...

The only problem with red is drinking it in the summer. I love a bit of red, but I live in an endless summer climate, so my love affair has to wait until holidays south.

Christiejolu said...

I can't even say Tequila any more without gagging! (Shudder) Too many Tequila Sunrises in Mexico!(Shudders again)

GypsyNurse said...

Happy St. Patty's day....
Sticking with the vodka though.. love the French maids costume... and never do the toilet!
Cat

Laurnie said...

I knew there was a reason I loved the stuff!! Have a fun secret weekend :)

Mr. Charleston said...

This sounds perfectly reasonable to me JennyMac, but I can't believe red wine can hold a candle to Jose Quervo. And with tequila, you get a table-dancing floor show to boot!

Existential Waitress said...

Man, did this remind me of some of my OWn drunk stories...yeah, a glass or two of red wine is probably much better. Have fun on your secret getaway, you lucky girl you!

J.J. said...

Darn it! I likes me Vodka but, just my luck, I don't have the body for a french maid costume.

Maria said...

How fabulous...a surprise weekend getaway...You will be in my neck of the woods! Hoping that the MIA weather behaves itself for you lovebirds!!

Melissa B. said...

Hmmmmmm...no WONDER I only drink Pinot Noir. And I thought it was just my natural drive...

secret agent woman said...

Suddenly my preference for red wine makes perfect sense!

Eyeglasses & Endzones said...

I knew I liked you for a darn good reason...I mean who else has a naked cowboy boots story...I'll tell mine if you tell yours...whatevs...I am off for a glass of red wine!

Jason, as himself said...

You just validated my whole life.

shortmama said...

And this is why I wish I liked wine...red or white! Enjoy your weekend!

Alicia said...

i'm not a drinker anymore, but now it all makes sense!!! have a wonderful weekend mama, i can't wait to hear about the adventures i'm sure you will find! hope you had an awesome st patty's!

Teddy Started It said...

Hey, I was wearing socks w/those cowboys boots...AND my holster & 6-shooter. Get your facts straight, lady. And who told you about that anyway? ;D

Nice blog!

My name is PJ. said...

We have 24 bottles of red wine on hand at all times....yes we do. We have a handful of white on hand.

"Petting the toilet like a puppy?" You do share great similes ....and your metaphors are darn funny too.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

I knew there was something more to red wine than heart healthy! No wonder hubby, who's not a drinker, doesn't mind when I imbibe! ;)

Chick Lit said...

Red wine? LOVE.

You are hilarious btw.

Liz said...

Oh, I think this is my favorite post ever. Or at least, right up there. How clever you are. And this explains A LOT...red wine has always made me a little, well, ehem, seductive? Going out to buy a bottle tonight. And sending your link to Hubby.

SpiritPhoenix said...

Boy is the scotch definition right on! I'll have to tell the Hubs about the Red Wine. Maybe then he'll be more understanding of my love of Cabernet Sauvignon!

BTW, I gave you the Beautiful Blogger award. I love your posts! You always make me laugh. Which is a great way to start my day!

Thanks!
http://thefiredeepwithin.blogspot.com/2010/03/beautiful-blogger-awardme-really.html

Salt said...

Long weekend? Where? If you are having one, I hope it's glorious.

We've gotten about 10 bottles of red wine for the wedding. Maybe I should start drinking it a little more often.

Sarahviz said...

Tequila makes your clothes fall off. That is all.

NotJustAnotherJen said...

Bang a gong, girlfriend!

I've long been a friend of the red.

Tami G said...

I LOVE this post!
and my BF gives me crap about drinking wine ALL THE TIME!
tells me it smells like feet!

I'm emailing this lovely little message to him RIGHT NOW!

Hope you have a GREAT weekend
(i'm SURE you will!)

Kristin said...

Wanna know what did it for me the other night? Mich Light. I'm classy like that!

Sarah said...

I love love love red wine. Actually, make that all kinds of wine. Thanks for the tip. Have a great weekend!

Erin said...

Johnny Mac is da bomb w/ his surprise getaway.

Red wine is the one that gives me a headache. So strange. I always thought it was the tannins? Oh well.

kathryn said...

Yum. Now, now. You don't want the other alcoholic beverages to get jealous, now do you?

I prefer to drink that gin martini...and karaoke be damned.

Hope your weekend is da bomb, sweetie. Raise your glass to the first day of spring...and just about anything else we can think of...

Cheers-

kathryn said...

Yum. Now, now. You don't want the other alcoholic beverages to get jealous, now do you?

I prefer to drink that gin martini...and karaoke be damned.

Hope your weekend is da bomb, sweetie. Raise your glass to the first day of spring...and just about anything else we can think of...

Cheers-

Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

my kids were just standing naked in my neighbor's lawn wearing only cowboy boots, but i'm not sure if tequila was the culprit. more like a penchant for nudism and a little insantiy thrown in for good measure!

Ellen said...

Running to the store for some red wine. Thanks for the idea. Found your blog through Friday Follow. Love it and am now a follower. Have a great weekend.

B Sparkly said...

Happy FF!! I'm now following you:) Come see me later.
Have a great weekend!
Anat

Bonnie said...

Fabulous! I'm so glad I enjoy drinking red wine, guess my husband has that figured out as well. :) We definitely have more red than white in our "cellar."

Thanks for the sweet comment over at my blog.

Enjoy your wine and good time this weekend!

xoxo,
Bonnie

Ed said...

Thanks for the tips.

(note to self: throw out beer and tequila, and by lots of expensive Reds)

Haha....You totally called out your friend D!

Nice!

Deb said...

Here from Friday Follow...please stop by

www.justshortofcrazy.blogspot.com

Corrie Howe said...

It is funny lately at all the scientific studies which are coming out which I say, "And we needed a study to prove that?" And actually, now that I think about it, all the studies have to do with sex. Hum? I wonder what that is saying about the world? Or what it's saying about me?

The Urban Cowboy said...

I knew there was a reason I always had a bottle of it...even though I don't drink it.

Little Ms Blogger said...

He planned a surprise getaway?! What a rare man.

If I don't plan it, it won't happen..

Jen R said...

Well, ring-a-ding-ding. You have a great weekend.

Happy FF back atcha!

Christopher said...

Going out to stock up right now.

veterankindergartenteacher said...

I found your blog through Friday follow! Have a terrific week-end! I am on my way to buy some red wine!

Andrea said...

Yeah, champagne seems to unleash an inner vixen too. I love red wine though. And as for too much tequila...you are absolutely right, nudity and vomit to follow.

Have a great weekend!

nycgirl0501 said...

I'm such a lightweight drinker I don't discriminate...2 drink gets me buzzed & only adds to the friskiness...will have to research the red wine factor ;) LOL

thank you for the comment on my blog. Have a great weekend getaway!

Sarah said...

I'm drinking red wine right now, and I demand to get laid, dammit.

Chef Green said...

You complete me a little bit.

Tropical Mum said...

Our wine collection consists only of reds, and the wrong person is drinking them. Hubby should be cut off and I should increase my intake.

Hope your weekend is purrrrfect.

Shelly

Midday Escapades said...

I'm in! Pour me some sex kitten.

I'm visiting and following from Friday Follow, and so glad you joined in this week! Have a terrific weekend.

~ Lynn
http://www.middayescapades.com

Amanda said...

I'm honestly not much of a fan of red wine. I like the white wine and beer much more. Tequilla and I are not friends, not at all. The rest of them, I gotta agree. But I do like the idea of being a sex kittens, so maybe I need to acquire that taste...

Kato said...

I usually go for the white, but this post makes me want to reach for the red! Meow indeed!

I hope you had a lovely weekend getaway! xoxo

C.J. said...

you have my vote!

Fragrant Liar said...

I take it you're still drunk or you'd have posted?

;-)

Baloney said...

You gotta throw in a vodka night every now and then.
Too bad red wine gives me migraines.

Vodka Logic said...

Aww but I'm not a wine fan... I will take my chances with the vodka

I hope you enjoyed your weekend