Tuesday, January 26, 2010

All felt up and no place to go...

At a gorgeous restaurant recently, I was enjoying lunch with some friends. Enroute to the powder room, I ran into a woman I used to work with years ago. Older than me by a decade or so, Mrs. W was an executive at the company. And a great person to work with because she was cutting edge, very intelligent, and not without a little sass. These being attributes I admire.

We chit chat for a several minutes before I step into a stall. When I exit the stall, I am reminded that yes, in fact, she is still cutting edge and sassy. Quite.

As I open the door and step back into the sink area, she says, “ I want to show you something.”

And she turns to me with shirt up and her chest fully exposed. Wait. I’m not Joe Francis.
She says, “ I got implants. What do you think?”

My thoughts form a triad:
1. Would a balcony in New Orleans perhaps be a better setting for this?
2. You must be drunk.
3. And I have no third thought because I am still pondering my first two thoughts.

She is very giddy. Post-divorce, her implants were a small gift to herself. And by small I mean not at all small.  She said, "Aren't they great? I am showing everyone."


I applaud liberation and celebration. She, a fan of both as well as imitation. But good for her. Did I need to see them ? I assure you I did not. I am not a prude by any means, by maybe I have a “I don’t need to see the knockers” clause.
I would never peg her a conservative but flashing me in a bathroom when I haven't seen her in years was also highly unpredictable. I was happy for her that she was so happy.  And they looked like a very well done cosmetic surgery should. The entire conversation occurs with her still defrocked and alternating her gaze between me and the mirror as she admires the surgeon’s handiwork.

Ok, maybe we can work in a little “Button Up” time into our conversation.

And then she says, “They feel completely real. Go ahead, feel them.”
“I think I will pass.”
“You must. How else will you know how real they feel?” she asks.

“I know what real boobs feel like because I have two of my own. Look, I will give mine a quick pat just for the sake of camaraderie.”

She laughs. And with some enthusiasm, gives her a pretty good maul. Reminded me a tiny bit of a kitty with a new toy.  Then another patron walks in the bathroom and is a bit confounded like she just walked into The Spearmint Rhino at shift change.

Mrs. W laughs and says, “Oh come in. I am just showing off my new present.” The other patron's level of comfort doesn’t improve by any means.
I say, "Well, maybe you can put those big girls under wraps. Because now we are all felt up and no place to go but back to work."

And as much as my portfolio of life experiences lacks the entry “felt up former co-worker in a bathroom” I am glad I opted out.  She on the other hand, bounded out of there on cloud nine. Either that, or just significantly air lifted due to new loftiness.

125 comments:

Jules said...

I've had this happen before....Yeah, no. You DON'T show everyone. Congrats on them...but let's keep them hidden. Most people can tell anyway. Thanks!

Rowe said...

One day you may well be ROTFLAO about this if you haven't already. What are the chances she is on Youtube, showing them off right now. It's a bit sad, though. Oh. My. God. What a godawful encounter for you that day and lets hope she gets over her giddiness and sanity returns real quick.

My name is PJ. said...

I would not have done well with that because I am of the animated facial expression ilk. Even if I don't say anything, when taken by surprise you can tell what I think.

Bless you, JMac for handling that so well. My hat's off to you.

af1blog said...

I can imagine EXACTLY how you felt (your reaction - not the boobs). I had a very similar experience years ago when a young woman I knew (though not in that special way at the time - later... we-ell... I not saying here am I?), sorry, getting off the point(s). Anyway this young woman who was previously somehwhat under-endowed lifted up her top in an only moderately private location to show her "new girls" in all their naked glory.

She was extremely attractive and I might well have regarded this as a very surprising and indeed welcome invitation, had her proud and grinning husband not been standing next to her at the time...

Great post. ;)

knit1kids4 said...

Oh my goodness... I would be floored!

Visiting from SITS

Simone said...

Most of us don't share our breasts in public (thank goodness).....so I just don't get why just because they are now fake breasts, you would show them to all and sundry AND ask them to feel them!! It's still your body even though they are implants...hello?!

I think you dealt with it brilliantly JennyMac.....great story too :)

Pam said...

I had something similar happen, but it was at a bar, it was almost 2 am and we were all very drunk. That's when it's supposed to happen, not at lunch with a co-worker!

BigSis said...

Great story. I totally would have felt them, no matter how well I knew her. I'm strange like that.

mbkatc230 said...

Oh my stars! Why do women who receive implants think that everyone needs to see them? I had a similar experience years ago with Cait's friend's mom - I had met this person exactly once. We were taking the girls to see - start laughing now - The Backstreet Boys for their mutual birthday. When she arrived at our home, the first thing she did was show off those new girls. Needless to say, it was way TMI. You handled this much better than I did! Kathy

C.J. said...

some very strange things happen in a woman's bathroom, wonder if those sorts of goings on happen in the men's? lol Probably not as they have it all right there to see. I grabbed your button. good post, see you again.

mo.stoneskin said...

Hilarious, but maybe you could have felt them. You know, for the sake of camaraderie.

Libby said...

I remember freshman year this girl in my dorm got nipple rings. I asked if it was true and instead of just saying yes, she decided to prove it by lifting her shirt in front of the dorm window while some welcome week tour was walking by.
I'm in awe of this kind of care-free-ness, though I don't think in need of it.

the walking man said...

I say be happy that she hadn't just gotten a full Brazilian Waxing, that would have been way worse a situation.

Too Many Hats said...

Women get so proud of their breast implants, they seem not to understand it isn't the same thing as showing off a new piece of bling. I personally could care less what they feel like, that's just not my thing, thanks.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

So, I would have felt them. Call me curious, call me a perv, but I am fascinated by fake boobs and how they feel. Did I just type that??

Eric said...

Yikes! That is weird to 'share', huh?
Well at least it was only boob surgery, I've heard they do other stuff these days.

Erin said...

And for the record, Lee felt my boobs last week when we met. But also for the record, I did not just whip them out for her---she asked. And she also felt them through my shirt. For whatever it's worth. Oh, and don't forget we were drunk! LOL

Theta Mom said...

What a story! And I'm with you, I would have passed...what an awkward sitation!!!

f8hasit said...

I guess at least you knew her?
I was at a benefit at the zoo, and my friends and I were talking with some other people while we stood in the drink que. This girl had enormous breasts. High. Perky. I would've thought they were definitely fake. My friend, who was tipsy, asked her if indeed they were implants. At which she lifted her shirt and bra to show her. "Touch them. They're real."

Well, I wasn't going to squeeze this 'ladies' breasts whom I didn't know in a line for a drink at a benefit at the zoo.

It was more than a little odd. And it still makes me feel weird recalling it.

Strange.
But I wish I had some of that body confidence!
:-)

Cee said...

I swear anyone who gets any type of boob job (implants or reduction) seems to be obligated to show them off. I don't get it!

Will Burke said...

I'm not a ladies-room-entering kinda weirdo, but the option was on the table for just a moment.

Rita/Fighting Off Frumpy said...

I had a similar scenario happen once ... only it wasn't a co-worker, it was a girl I barely knew.

... And it wasn't new boobs, but a pierced, um, nether-region.

*shudder*

Eva Gallant said...

That was too funny! A girl I worked with years ago did something similar...and several of her co workers agreed..they did feel real! lol

Buckeroomama said...

Whoa, a bit too bizarre and too awkward for me. Glad she's happy with her boob job, but I wouldn't want to feel them either.

JenJen said...

In with the boobs, out with the modesty.

Joshua said...

So, I took a friend in college to get a piercing. As it was happening, I was perusing the artwork on the walls. I was then summoned to a piercing room, ushered in, and found her pantsless, legs apart, showing me her new piercing. Not where I thhought she was getting one, and certainly not something I needed to see considering her boyfriend (and now husband) and I were good friends since high school.

Shorty said...

That's the one thing I can't stand about gals who get augmented... they feel overly inclined to share their boobs with the world. Where did modesty go? Keep those babies under wraps and save a bit of mystery for those who still enjoy it.

Colleen said...

I have had almost this same experience. Twice. What is it with implants that turns women into exhibitionists?

I'm not really a fan of implants. They bug me.

ellen abbott said...

What happened to the time when getting a boob job was a well kept secret? You know, they were invented in my dear old city and my mom was one of the first to get some (this was about 1975). She went from flat chested to enormous (claiming that it was the smallest size). Frankly she looked like an escapee from the freak show. I don't get the desire to brag about FAKE boobs. I wonder if they will still be bragging about them when they have sunk to the bottom of their rib cage (and they will).

Your ex-coworker should join a gym. It's a mutual admiration society.

Brian Miller said...

you had 3 more thoughts than i would have...lol. oh my.

Scrappy Girl said...

Wow! You get yourself into some crazy predicaments...this made me lol. I would have freaked out!

jules said...

I mean, I'm not prude either, but even with shiny new fake boobs, I can't imagine just whipping them out and aiming them at an acquaintance much less suggesting they have a feel!

The Boob Nazi said...

I don't want to SEE fake boobs; I want to FEEL them to see how hard they are. I know, that's weird. But I reeeaaally want to.

fromatopink said...

Oh wow. I'm not sure how I would have reacted to that situation! It does make for a good story, doesn't it? :)

Michael Rivers said...

I used to work with a lady who would do the same thing. Look! Feel! She was so proud of them. I guess it is like a new toy?

Slamdunk said...

I was trying to think of an equivalent experience in my life... and...well... I am stumped.

I bet the woman who entered the facilities during your discussion was looking for hidden cameras in that the described discussion ust could not be really happening.

foxy said...

You know, I can't say I've ever been in a situation where someone has offered me a feel of their fakies. Now, I have to admit, the work environment is a little awkward, but if that happened to me and I were somewhere other than work, I may have felt them. It may be a little strange, but I'm oddly curious about them.

La La La Leah said...

that is awesome! I don't know what I would do if that happend to me.... I guess it would depend on where we were at and who it was...... I am glad you survied. Well on the bright side it does sound like she got a good boob job. Compared to her getting a crappy one and showing you.....

Intense Guy said...

Damn... some people have ALL the luck!! :)

And some people have to pay good money to do something like what was offered to you --- for free!

Michele said...

First, kudos for people doing that which makes them happy. Second, no kudos for people not understanding that I not want to share in all aspects of their joy. :-)

ShellSpann said...

WOW. I guess if I spent that much money on new boobs I'd prob want to show them off. But I don't think I could ever do that in a public restroom!! Maybe to CLOSE friends or something. But not to a former colleague!

Aunt Jackie said...

OMG So hilarious, and very entertaining to read. Sounds like the other patron might be a bit traumatized.

It's amazing what little things (and big things alike) can do for people's confidence and self-esteem.

A shame, however that they feel they have to give the world a front-row seat! ;)

Thanks for walking through the 'Forrest'!

Leah Rubin said...

Good grief, talk about no boundaries! This woman-- no matter how confident she is-- needs to think about personal space, and the other person's comfort level... When did it become okay to grope another woman in the ladies' room???

Maybe now, seven days post-septoplasty, I should urge people to check it out: "Go ahead, really, stick your finger up my nose-- it's really been repaired inside! How will you know if you don't touch???" NOT!

Jenny said...

That is hilarious. My friends mom did that to me when she had hers done, but it was at their house, still uncomfortable but at least it wasn't in a restaurant bathroom.

Jenn@ You know... that blog? said...

OMG hahahaha!!!

Too funny! I'm with you, and I most DEFINITELY have a clause that specifically states that I should never be presented with escaped knockers of any ilk. Even moobs make me squirm.

Boy JM... you know some... um... free spirits, don't you! ;)

Nonflammable said...

That is so funny especially for the time and place of such a display.

Recently, I was out with the girls at a bar and a friend of a friend decided to uncover her new boobage in the lounge of the bathroom. My other 'crazy' friend quickly lifted her shirt too, only hers were real. This produced a bunch of giggles and a look of shock from the augmented girl.

Big Boops said...

I have actually had this same experience several times. I had one friend who decided to pierce her nipples, wanted to show me, then commented that her boyfriend thought she had stripper nipples. G.R.E.A.T. my life is complete.

I feel kind of sad for myself now, maybe I need to get happy about my tits and start letting people know about it.

Eyeglasses & Endzones said...

Let me just say Kuddos for not giving in on that one. I had a girl friend get implants and she as well was showing them off like she just bought a new purse. It was and IS rather disturbing, if you are doing this for yourself....then UM KEEP THEM TO YOURSELF!!!

Yeah for her, if they make her feel amazing, that is all that matters but the rest of us innocent bi-standards...we need to live with the fact that we have seen a friend / co -worker a little TOO proud ;)

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Back in the day (as in my twenties) I had a few women acquintances ask me to feel their new boobs. but would not see it coming at this time.

Tiffany said...

a freind of mine (who i hadn't seen in a couple of years) pulled something similar. i said 'your boobs look bigger' and she says 'that's b/c they are' then whips one out of her tank top. i mean, if you just told me you got implants i would have believed you just the same.

i too opted out of copping a feel.

Summer said...

Awk...ward! lol. People show me things I'd rather not see ALL the time. I mean, I'm not prude. When my cousin had hers done, I was like, "Let me see. NOW." There was no need for touching. I wanted to see if it was something I would want to buy for myself. We're on that kind of level though, and we weren't in public.

Yankee Girl said...

That is awesome that she is so confident but there has to be a line drawn somewhere!

Red Boots said...

I can only imagine the expression on your face and she whipped them out! Priceless!

And way to go for picking herself up after her divorce. Though perhaps getting them out was a bit too much... x

Pricilla said...

erm, not sure what to write. Perhaps I am just too old for this one.

Salt said...

I will never ever ever understand why some women with new implants want you to touch them. I've been asked to do this also (granted it was slightly less weird because it was a good friend of mine and we weren't in a public restroom with her shirt up) and i just really really don't care what fake boobs feel like. If I cared, I would go get some for myself.

I'm happy for Mrs. W and all, but jeez, lady, reign it in. (Reign them in?)

ByDSea said...

Too funny. My sister did that to me after purchasing some for herself. Only she grabbed my arm and placed my hand on them before I knew what was happening. Therefore, I have felt up my own sister. I'm not sure why people get so proud of them, should those of us with real ones be running around saying look what I was blessed with? lol
Cheers,
C

Angie S said...

Wow...I have a friend that wanted me to touch hers, but a woman from awhile ago...crazy~ness!!

I would have hoped that a big black hole would have swallowed me up at that exact moment!

Mira said...

Yikes, can we say 'boundaries?' Not ok.

Brandy said...

I had an old babysitter who had breast implants and although she didn't pull up her shirt, she def wanted me to check them out from over her shirt and give my two cents about them! I think those with implants are like this, very proud and not afraid to show them off. It is like a new toy I think! LOL

Amanda said...

Holey moley! That is soo hilarious. I think no matter how good I thought my "girls" looked would I ever in my life do that. What an experience!!

Ms Bibi said...

Wow....I mean wow....I wouldn't know what to do first and where to look if suddenly they were there in my face.
I don't think I would handle it as well as you did,lol.

Existential Waitress said...

Yeah, I am pretty familiar with the "let me show you my fake boobs" situation. I have never felt any though. People are just a wee bit too comfortable discussing and exposing their fake tits. I live in Vegas. I should know.

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Oversharing for sure.

linlah said...

Isn't showing them off the whole point of getting them?

i am playing outside said...

I am officially wondering if I should continue reading this blog, or wait for the insanely comedic movie about your life, which MUST be made.

Ashley Stone said...

haha, my mom wanted to get a boob job a few years back but decided if she did, she'd want to show them to everyone, so it was best she didn't. I agreed!

Kathryn said...

What I don't get is how she expects people to react to them. I mean, are you supposed to be all, "Oh, I am soooo jealous! My girls are fluffy pancakes next to your cantaloupes!" Maybe she's signed a contract with the plastic surgeon to display them a certain number of times a week to drive in new business...maybe she receives a cut?
Or, maybe (warming to the subject) it's like when you're pregnant and everyone has to touch da belly...only she has TWO new munchkins in the oven. Ew. That can't be right.
Kudos for handling a most inappropriate moment with such panache. What a trooper!

Southern Champagne Wishes said...

Oh no! I'm dying. I've had a couple of friends get implants, but none have ever asked me to touch them (Thank God), let alone in a public restaurant bathroom. You know the lady who walked in will be dining out on that story for weeks!

Badass Geek said...

Wow. Why don't women ask men to feel their new additions? I think men would be much more appreciative.

Emily said...

You know, I would be kind of indifferent to looking, but seriously, I'm not going to go groping on some other chick. Who asks that!? And there must be something in the blogging water day...this is the 3rd post I've read on boobs and I posted about boobs too.

Myya said...

I've been in the locker room before & witnessed this... I wasn't too uncomfortable especially since I was really happy for her - they were a rebuild after a double masectomy. I still however do not think this is appropriate. One day I am hoping to get a nice little perk (maybe a reduction too) but I PROMISE I will not go around all Girls Gone Wild. Well... that is unless I loose about 20+ lbs & have ripped abs too! LOL

AmyLK said...

You handled that so much better than I think I could have! How could you go back to a normal lunch and afternoon after that? lol

carissajaded said...

Hahaha, well I gotta say, not only does this lady have some boobs, but she's also got some balls... Good for her!!!

The Vegetable Assassin said...

I'll tell you where she went wrong Jenny. She should've gone into the MEN'S bathrooms. I'm pretty sure they'd have helped her test her puppies. Personally, I'd have given them a honk because I've never felt fake boobies myself and I'm curious. I'd have got one of those puppies in each hand and jiggled them. Do they even jiggle, I don't know? Anyway I thought the purpose of implants was to make a person feel better about themselves and look great, not to point them out to everyone on Earth as being you know...fake.

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

I thought that stuff only happened on TV and in the movies. What a hoot.

Confessions of a Mother, Lawyer & Crazy Woman said...

I am LAUGHING at this post so hard; weirdly, my earlier post from today also referenced Girls Gone Wild ... more Moms Gone Wild ... So, we are on the same brain wavelength ... maybe not such good news for you, but great for me ... ( :

Thanks for the actual laugh-out-loud laugh!

Ed Adams said...

I see absolutely nothing wrong with this.




Well, except that I wasn't there.

HalfAsstic.com said...

Maybe the more new boob-a-ly enhanced people drink the more.... buoyant, they become.
Seems plausible. ;-)
It would have been so funny to see her face if you had come at her with two groping hands on the ends of outstretched arms, saying, "NOM, NOM, NOM, NOM!"
That's the kind of thing I would pay money to see. Heh!
(Yes, I have a sick mind... sheesh!)

Gillian said...

You should've grabbed them, squished them really hard and left her writhing in pain.

Angry Julie Monday said...

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've had that happen to me. Even in the locker room at work. But I live in Orange County, I have an excuse, muhahahahahhaa

Unknown Mami said...

I hope you never run into her after she's gotten vaginal rejuvenation surgery.

Lissaloo said...

That is hilarious!
I guess she felt very comfortable with her new gift and was in a sharing mood, lol :)

CRY said...

Glad a mom didnt come in with a young one, especially a little boy, young one.
I hear of so many (tacky,no class) women doing this often that get implants.
To show them is tacky
to tell the person they are showing to feel them
Come on, Are you kidding me!
I cant imagine any women thinking another woman would want to feel her fakees, maybe a man and that would be tacky too!

WhisperingWriter said...

I'd like new boobs...just so I could have a B cup, you see. Not porn star boobs. And I definately would not ask people to feel them.

Postman said...

What? Seriously? Woman actually ask other women to feel them up?! HUH?? Whoa, all those dirty-minded lesbian-fantasizing college roommates of mine would probably keel over if they heard that...

I wouldn't object to being a tactile connoisseur of breast implants...I'd have to practice a lot to get good, though...

shortmama said...

I was already laughing at the title...but oh the story is even better! I mean really she couldnt just say "so I got divorced and then got some new boobs).

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

oh my word, that is simply hilarious. "I'm showing everyone"???? Ahhh!

singedwingangel said...

roflmbo OK I found ya at Lee's place and the blog title piqued my curiosity. That is hilarious. Alas it also sounds like something my now 71 yr old mother would pull had she had that done lol.. However she nor I have a need for implants lol maybe a lift... new follower hun have a great day

Busy Bee Suz said...

I had a family member do this to me at my MILs house one time. So wierd. I don't even try to show off a new car to folks..but maybe that is just me! I wish her many enjoyable years with her perky tata's.
I hope for your sake she does not get a vaginal rejuvination any time soon.

Mighty M said...

So strange...never happened to me. After losing weight and having 2 kids (okay, and getting older) I admit I am always thinking about how nice the girls might look with a teeny bit of work on them. But if I ever did, I would NEVER EVER show them off like that! YIKES!

MammaDucky said...

My experience involved a hot tub and a VERY drunk and very new friend. Sounds like a porno.
I actually thought this chick was gonna try to make out with me next. It was uncomfortable to say the least. "I've never told anyone, but (whips out a boob), I got implants!!" Why, for the love of Bob, did you choose ME to share this with?! I don't even know you!! She then advanced, insisting I touch them. I declined, so she started rubbing them, proclaiming them wonderful.

DeNae said...

This has happened to me. TO ME!! A middle-aged, Mormon housewife!! And the flasher was another MAMH!

Honestly, there is only one scenario I can think of where I would say to someone, "Go ahead, give 'em a grab" and that's if the EMTs were wondering if the girls had survived a bra-bomb.

An exercise in search and rescue? Yes. Just for kicks and giggles in the ladies' room? I'll pass, thanks.

otin said...

I really am not a fan of breast implants, but I am a fan of spycams in bathrooms capturing two women feeling each other up! haha.

plo said...

I had a friend with them...and loved to put them in your face whenever possible...at first I found it amusing, but it got old real quick! YEP! Got the tickets at HOB in Chicago for HIM, thanks for asking!!

Nathanael Rey said...

hahahahahaha. This had me rolling.

ajm said...

Haha, awesome! I have a few friends that just recently upgraded in the boob department, and they flashed 'em too. A girl at the gym even showed hers, and she was a virtual stranger. It must be that once you purchase boobs (and for no small fee), they are like any other item you spend a lot of money on. You gotta show 'em off. Like a lovely new pair of designer shoes. Or sort of.

bluzdude said...

I just can't imagine guys doing that in a similar situation... like, say, a dude gets his own "enhancement".

I could never see the guy going, "Hey Al, check out the new schlong!"

Aunt Juicebox said...

Why do women do this? If I didn't ask to see your tatas BEFORE you got implants, chances are I just don't want to look at your tatas. Live with the disappointment.

J.J. in L.A. said...

Only a woman would have a “I don’t need to see the knockers” clause. God knows my man wouldn't!!! ; )

This reminds me of when a brother offered his friends an opportunity to see a little skin for a buck. Of course, that skin was on my backside after having a skin graft (he thought the scar was funny-looking enough to make a little cash).

Corrie Howe said...

Okay, what is it about you that draws these kinds of people into your sphere for blog fodder?

JennyMac said...

LOL Corrie. I pay close attention to any blog fodder opportunities. AND traveling plus living in a city of 5.5 million people provides exactly that type of opportunity so very frequently. haha.

Vivienne said...

The Spearmint Rhino at shift change...

I may have wet my pants a little from all the laughing. And I may have spit a little bit of my wine onto the screen.

bunny, The Paris House Designs said...

This is a riot!! I can't even imagine doing something like that, even after 7 shots of tequila and an offer of $1,000 I still couldn't do it..was she sober??? LOL

Just Breathe said...

Really, this really happened? I can't imagine someone doing that other than maybe a super close friend or a sister.

Hissyfits & Halos said...

I would have told her that she needed to jump up and down real fast so you could judge the workmanship.

Lauren said...

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOBS.

Dustjacket Attic said...

I have to say I found this sooo hilarious, I was picturing you with your hands on her boobs turning to see the incoming traffic...I'm innocent!
xxxx

Matthew said...

Hmm. Yet another person who knows someone with implants who's prepared to flash 'em.

I need to expand my social circle I think. All of my friends are unenhanced, more's the pity... :)

kilax said...

Oh my gosh. Did this really happen? Wow! I am all about not being shy, but that seems a bit strange. I suppose she is trying to show how strong she is after the divorce.

Trenches of Mommyhood said...

Thanks for making my day with this entry! I'm imagining the visual to be hilarious! (and I prob would've felt them. Just cuz.)

NotJustAnotherJen said...

Love it. Thanks for the good laugh this morning!

Kato said...

Oh. My. God. That was the single-handed best, funniest post ever! I cannot believe that happened to you. I really do not know how I would have reacted!

I am a bit jealous now, that no one has shown me their boobies. Well, heres to hoping :)

Ela said...

I completely understand why people opt to have the procedure but I will never understand why they need to show them off. Reminds me of the time we headed to the husband's boss's cottage for dinner. His wife just had it done. She decided she would let us know subtly, and by subtle I mean wear a bathrobe that is not tied up. The entire time. Before and after dinner.

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

I can not stop laughing but there is NO way I am explaining to my kids why I am laughing....

secret agent woman said...

Good Lord. And what if you hadn't thought, "Good for you." Because my response would have been more along the lines of, "Yeah, thanks for playing into the idea that woman's bodies can't be beautiful without the addition of plastic."

Mrs. Lovely said...

This reminds me of a scene in the movie, "The Sweetest Thing", one of the characters lets strangers feel up her boobs. Entertaining on film, but would be awkward in real life I imagine.

Red Shoes said...

I wonder if Robert Redford goes around showing people his nutsack tuck??? I can see it now... 'hey... look at this...'

~shoes~

Jerry said...

Well hell -- if she had insisted I guess I would have reluctantly felt her newly transformed breasts. But then I am a man....I guess that makes a difference.

Secretia said...

How society has changed, it's only like showing off a new tattoo to some people.

magda said...

"give mine a quick pat for camaraderie". so quick and generous of you to come up with plan B to avoid groping Cup DDD.

outstanding...in many ways

M-Cat said...

My SIL was the same when she got hers. WE all had to touch them, look at them, admire them....ick

The Absence of Alternatives said...

"I know what real boobs feel like because I have two of my own. Look, I will give mine a quick pat just for the sake of camaraderie." LOL. That was a great line. Note to self: need to remember to react in said situation. I wish someone will one day ask me to feel up their fake boobs. You attract strange people that are supposed to be highly functional people in the society. LOL

Laoch of Chicago said...

She sounds likable, in an intellectual sort of way.

Liz said...

I think I will go feel myself up a bit...(they're real).

undomestic chica said...

By no means am I trying to make assumptions about all people with implants but the few I know always want to show them off. My mom's friend (who is well over 40 and knows what's appropriate and what isn't) showed my mom in the middle of her kitchen before a dinner party.

And a former co-worker of mine made me feel her up waiting in line for the bathroom in a club. The worst part was I was a club promoter so quite a few people who knew me gave ME weird looks eventhough SHE insisted!