Monday, April 12, 2010

One for the money, two for the show


After a hearty time sipping concoctions and testing our luck at one of our favorite casinos, Bellagio, I needed the powder room. Why did I pick the powder room with only four stalls and ten women waiting in line versus the other women's rooms that could house a small jet? I have no logical answer. Why did the person in front of me not quite properly flush the commode? Another answer I don't know. Should I wait for another stall after I have already waited for fifteen minutes? Mmmmm. Tempting. But no.

Should I simply put my foot on the handle to flush. Sure. I have preferences, one being please flush the %$@# toilet before you leave, but I know when to set my preferences aside, as in when it is a long, long line in the lav and just getting longer.

I simply place my foot on the handle for a quick push. What does the toilet do? Erupts.

Nothing says HIGH CLASS like an erupting toilet. I don't care if it was Steve Wynn's private guest house. Exploding toilet = ILL.  And not exactly what I had in mind for dancing in the rain. Oh, and the shoes? Oh...the shoes!

Should I have simply elected to wipe those shoes down? Sure. Except they were suede. Gives a new creative twist to the state of being pissed off. A girl is going to garner a frown after being momentarily caught in a urine fountain. Not exactly Slumdog Millionaire where he dives under the outhouse but still, very VERY unsavory. And I am quite confident some equally unsavory words flew out of my mouth whilst I was being doused.

I went to the room to change shoes and place my suede victims in the trash. Then I stomped right out of that room and downstairs to the blackjack table. Karma, might you want to give me some lovin'? After all, you just schlepped on my new suede shoes.

She did. And this time, she paid me back gracefully. One of our friends said, at that rate, I will go in that bathroom and let that toilet explode on me. Ahhh, while that does sound like a fetching idea, I didn't attempt that fate twice. 

Speaking of Vegas, you know who else is a big winner: Big congrats to MommyLisa from Mommy's Nest for the ultimate chocolate lover's giveaway. Email me Lisa and I will put you in touch with Chocomize. 

79 comments:

Cara Smith said...

Hopefully you made enough to cover the cost of the shoes you lost.

Secretia said...

I love Las Vegas when I'm winning!

Jules said...

Damn you and never picking my name..........

singedwingangel said...

OH I would have been furious.. and talking to some management. That is just nasty.. but hey at least you won something...

Brian Miller said...

i so want to see and exploding toilet...

Tracie said...

That is what I would less-eloquently call a Yeah...Boo situation.

Congrats to Mommy Lisa!

Pam said...

Well, at least karma worked for you this time!

Mrsblogalot said...

Yeah, I could use an exploding toilet over here too! (-:

mo.stoneskin said...

That's why I refused to go to the toilet when I'm wearing my blue suede shoes.

Pammy pam said...

that is just disgusting. i would have thrown my feet away too! ick. ew. i hate public toilets.

Matthew said...

I would hate to laugh at your expense so I'm going to send this comment whilst I can still control myself....

Eric said...

Toilet mishaps are terrible, but what a great story!

The stonework in Bellagio is great, but my favorite is immediately to the right as you face it.

Fact: My brother and I have never lost a series of single deck blackjack in the 12+ table hours we've played at Paris and Planet Hollywood.

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Glad the night ended on an up note.

The Boob Nazi said...

Ugh. How disgusting.

Slamdunk said...

For guys, flushing public toilets is more the exception than the rule--which is likely why they invented those auto flushers.

Glad you survived the brush with disgusting.

Jen said...

I am all for a new pair of shoes but I don't think that I want to get them that way. ;)

Rachel Cotterill said...

I've never been to Vegas, but when I do go, I'm going to be really careful with the loos!

Mighty M said...

So glad you didn't have to go all "Slumdog Millionaire" on that toilet! At least it was ONLY your shoes that were desecrated!

I hope you bought some more with your winnings! We are going to Vegas next month - so excited!! :)

Simply Suthern said...

Dang, I have seen my share of overflows and public toliets but I have never seen one erupt. It must be something to behold.

Steadfast Ahoy! said...

What a horrible story written so well. Loved all the play-on-words you used. Glad you could see the up side of that ugly incident.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Oh man that would suck to have a urine fountain douse your suede shoes. Good thing Karma was looking out for you afterwards, though. I'm with your friends - I would have been tempted to have the toilet erupt on my shoes if it brought me good luck at the Blackjack table. ;)

koopermom said...

Oh, your poor shoes!!! Hope they weren't favorites!

Little Ms J said...

Sorry the shoes lost their life in Vegas. There could've been better ways to go. They could've jumped from one of the balconies at the Luxor, which is always a popular choice.

Congrats on beating the house, love!

Mommy Lisa said...

I once flused a toilet at a house party and the tank exploded...

The chocolate makes up for that.

:)

Intense Guy said...

...literally a "golden shower"...

Bossy Betty said...

Devil=cobbler. Las Vegas=Sin City. Gambling. Drinking. Oh, put it all together, Jenny Mac!

Moxie Momma said...

Oh boy, not many people can say they've had that experience! Just popping over from the UBP to say hi.
I'm in Georgia too, Savannah. Check out my blog if you get a chance www.moxiemomma.com. I'm hosting a great giveaway that you might be interested in.
Take care,
Michelle

Katherine said...

That is FUNNY and SO like what would happen to me... but it sounds like you can now buy NEW shoes, no? :)

Dumblond said...

Oh holy heck. I hate having to use public bathrooms. You'd think in a WOMAN'S bathroom, things would be a bit nicer, ie. flushing.
How hard is it to flush? Both of my children have mastered it!

MommyLovesStilettos said...

I would be so pissed about the shoes!!

Linda said...

I might have been tempted to put those lovely 'wet' shoes on the check in desk and ask for repayment! Hah but then you took the casino for some change anyway! Good for you!

Kristina P. said...

I am horrible at gambling. I never win. I would have been determined too!

Herding Cats said...

Sad day for suede shoes. I would be so pissed. I'm glad karma repaid you though :)

McVal said...

"Don't poo on my blue suede shoes..." Aren't those lyrics of a song?
Sorry for your icky-poo trip to the toilet!

xoxoKrysten said...

Yuck. That is just wrong!

Mom in High Heels said...

Oh, the horror! Not your shoes!!!!

WannabeVirginia W. said...

I would have had to the hotel get me the exact same shoes pronto somewhere or at least pay for it.

Pricilla said...

Next time patent leather?

SmartBear said...

Annnnnd this is why I dislike Las Vegas so (I know, I am weird). Las Vegas is kind of my version of hell. UNLESS, I won enough money to buy a whol closet full of fab shoes. That could change my mind.

DeNae said...

First, SmartBear, I can tell you from personal experience that Vegas is NOT Hell, but it is the last place you can stop for gas on your WAY to Hell.

Second, Jenny, ICK.

Third, also Jenny, if this happened in the last 3 months, I'm coming to Atlanta just so I can sit in your office and sulk at you. Come all the way to Vegas just to have the Bellagio piddle on you, and not look me up?

I don't THINK so!!

Theta Mom said...

Nothing says gross more than an exploding toilet!

Aging Mommy said...

Having just spent the weekend dealing with vomit, my daughter's first stomach virus experience, I can sympathize but at the same time thank you for making me laugh. I needed that!

That's the trouble with suede - I bought a suede purse once which I could not resist but stains were irresistibly drawn to it and impossible to remove. Never again!

At least now you can afford not only some new shoes and a new outfit or two to go with them!

Eva Gallant said...

I stayed at the Bellagio about 8 years ago and won $435 on the quarter slots! Good times.
Darn. ..wanted to win that cocolate. Oh well, my bar (Eva's Ecstasy should be here tomorrow or Wednesday.

Heather Taylor said...

So sorry about the shoes, but at least the payback was sweet!

IASoupMama said...

I am glad that karma was good to you! I'm stopping by on Theta Mom's recommendation and, as always, her taste is impeccable! Now following...

4W said...

hope you had that cocktail?

Salt said...

The Bellagio is one of my faves.
I'm sorry about your shoes, but it sounds like you were repaid enough to at least afford a new pair if you wanted? :)

I don't think there would be any other way to make a pee shower sound so good.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

I am so sorry for the fate of the shoes but so glad you got something out of it!

Richard @ The Bewildered Brit said...

Ewwww!

I shall wear patent leather next time I'm in Vegas!

Tropical Mum said...

I must admit, I'm not a woman that has a fetish for shoes, as I live in thongs (flip flops, not the underwear)--it is the tropics after all. However, I have a friend who is afflicted with the obsession with shoes (spare room devoted to the storage of said apparel), and I can understand the loss and expense that one can experience with having to bin such a beautiful pair of shoes.

It's all ying and yang though eh? (that last bit's the Canadian in me) and Lady Luck was shining on you to make up for your mishap in the loo. Good on you!

Vegas, toilet incident aside, sounds like fun. I would love to go there one day.

Shelly

brainella said...

Here's hoping it was ONLY the suede shoes, and not the feet too, that got a urine bath. Nothing says yuck like pee between the toes...

Myya said...

Ummmm gross! I love how you describe things. I actually chuckle when I am reading your stuff! Gald the BlackJack table was good to you... you so deserved it after the yucky potty break!

wendy said...

I hate public bathrooms. HATE THEM...even at a classy place like the Bellagio.
WHAT - you threw the blue (ah yellow??) suede shoes away?

Vegas is fun and always entertaining.
If you don't get crapped on at the casinos, you get "pissed on" in the ladies room.
Apparently what happens in Vegas doesn't ALWAYS stay in Vegas

Bumpkin on a Swing said...

Only you could tell this story with such grace Jenny. Congrats on the extra good karma, but really I think you paid your dues, or rather paid your shoes :)

Jane Kennedy Sutton said...

Yuck! I think you were very restrained which is probably why lady luck gave you a break. I believe I would have plopped the condemned shoes on the counter of the front desk and ask them for replacements.

From Tracie said...

This story goes from gross to good...a bit of a roller coaster! I hope you got some great new shoes to replace the ruined ones!

HalfAsstic.com said...

Well, at least karma didn't let you down at the tables. Cause I mean if that had happened after getting pee on suede, of all things, then you might as well just go straight to bed. Nothing else good can come of that day. ;-)

Kristy said...

Nothing better than winning in the casino! Makes up for other people's urine, ruined suede shoes, and humiliation. Kind of. I guess.

Alicia said...

oh no!! well at least karma was nice enough to pay you back!! lol...and when i think bellagio i think of delicious crepes! mmmmmm i need to go to vegas!

She's A Shortcake said...

Going to Vegas at the end of May, should I go to the same stall to see if luck will shower me?!??!?!

Ms. Salti said...

Ewww... and at the Bellagio!? Well, at least karma paid you back... now you can buy some new shoes!

Writing Without Periods! said...

Vegas...I lived there for years. It's very cool when you are winning...very depressing when you aren't.
Lucky you,
Mary

MrsDixon said...

Your poor shoes! But surely winning was a great way to brighten your day!

Erin said...

suede makes me nervous.

I should blog about the time our toilet erupted. omg. It still gives me nightmares even though it didn't involve any expensive/fashionable shoes.

Vivienne said...

No no no! I would've happily accepted my karmic winnings, but the Bellagio management would've been buying mama a new pair of shoes as well.
ew.

Christiejolu said...

That sucks but at least Karma paid you back in a good way!

Ellen said...

OK, so this totally sucks, but I'm pretty sure the toilet water on the cute new suede shoes thing is good luck. At least that's what I'd tell myself ;)

http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/

Laoch of Chicago said...

I am not sure that this karmic winning formula is really worth it in the long run.

Leah Rubin said...

I can't believe you had to sacrifice a pair of suede shoes to the vagaries of the plumbing!

At least you had a win to help ease your pain!

Ashley Stone said...

Oh no! Nothing worse than a ruined pair of cute shoes! Glad you won though!

Jennifer said...

I'm with Smartbear... "Las Vegas is kind of my version of hell. UNLESS, I won enough money to buy a whole closet full of fab shoes. That could change my mind." Exactly THIS. Nobody messes with the shoes, man.

mama-face said...

that'll teach you. :-) Wear the disposable shoes next time.

(yeah, the whole not flushing the toilet phenomena drives me crazy. hm. what did her shoes look like when she exited the stall?)

shortmama said...

ewwww...I think the shoes also would have puke on them after I hurled about having my feet doused with someone elses pee!

Unknown Mami said...

I have nightmares about exploding toilets. I'm glad you won something later to make up for that horrid batism.

Allyson & Jere said...

Seriously?...beyond disturbing! I might not have been able to function without a wire brush to clean my feet after that. Sorry for your shoe loss, but at least you won some cash at the tables. Were you JUST in Vegas, like last week, when I was? 'Cause that would just be crazy talk.

Chuck said...

I have a feeling you won't have an answer that I want to hear for this question...
Where are those shoes from in the image used for this post?

I've been searching the internet for days now and I've had no luck.

I am LOVING those heels!

Comment me back at ChuckRefreshed if you have the answer (I'm hoping you do).

Ellen said...

If those shoes in the pic are the recipient of the exploding toilet - please say you really didn't throw them out?! They are fantastic! Sorry Karma "crapped" on ya. Hopefully she made up for it and you won some moolah to buy a new pair of shoes or at least have enough cocktails to help forget.

T!nK said...

LoL. I coudl use that type of luck!

the money kind... nt the peepee kind.

T!nK said...

LoL. I could use that kind of luck!!

the money kind... not the peepee kind.