What never occurs to me is reckless defiance of all social morays with not a shred of care for danger or consequences.
Of course, recklessness and lawlessness don't occur to you either so you might be trying to see the correlation here. Oh do come closer and I will share.
Before I begin, let me note that I am a big fan of L.A. I have spent numerous weeks there and have always received the gold star treatment (and I am no one that matters in L.A. I assure you.) While many accuse Los Angeles of being trite, fake, shallow, that has not been my experience in any visit.
L.A. is a town that has many a pretty face, and one that proves the earth's crust isn't the only place in which silicone is the second most abundant element. Because I have always had a fabulous time, recent news of antics must be met with a modicum of concern.
After the recent NBA Championship series in which the Lakers beat the Magic, I am certain much celebrating was in store. With not only great play, Phil Jackson also broke Red Auberbach's record with his tenth title win and is now, the winningest coach in NBA Playoffs. Just like Kool and the Gang...celebrate, good times, come on. I am sure the majority of people celebrated in style, after all, who doesn't like a good fizzing champagne geyser.
However, did you know what the other idiots in L.A. were doing? To them, a note:
Dear (certain) Citizens of L.A:
Hark the Kobe Bryant sings....I am sure you were all crazed with excitement. When I am excited, I might go a touch wild too, but you know what I don't do? Light things on fire. If you werent sure what you should do, perhaps look to your knight in basketball armor. What was he doing? Oh, leaping with joy. You know what he wasn't doing? Lighting things on fire. So if the man who helped land the Title was satisfied with merely dancing a jig...why weren't you?
In all your joyful bedlam, you couldn't just high five each other? Even cover your body in purple and gold paint? Even a tattoo of the Lakers logo wouldn't be too fanatic for you true fanatics, would it? But no, you thought good times = fire. Wow.
And the throwing of rocks and bottles at police officers and other people who are also celebrating with you.
And the total destruction of buses.
And the looting of garages.
And throwing of lit fireworks into crowds.
And then more arson.
And then the flipping of the police car. Oh, excuse me: the attempted flipping of the police car.
Here are some wonderful photos of your night time activity. Yours is an interesting version of a victory dance.
Now, while I am an attorney, I am certainly not well versed in police investigation tactics. However, I could give you one or two pieces of advice.
When celebrating, do not act like a complete %@#&*!^ moron. Oh, too late for that?
How about: Do not set property on fire. Especially property that does not belong to you. And then POSE IN FRONT OF YOUR CRIME WITH YOUR BAND OF #&@*^!%$! moron friends and let someone take your picture. How hard will the LAPD have to dig for you? Not too deep when you photograph is on the front the Times, the Sentinel, and the LA Daily News. Good job, smarty.
Clearly, you DO like riots.
In 2000, after the Lakers won their first NBA title in 12 years, you also enjoyed rioting outside Staples Center, with more burning police cars and countless other acts of juvenile thought process. Dozens of people were arrested and injured then.
Stop that. Burning down someone's news stand certainly doesn't make your victory any sweeter. And since only 25 people were arrested that night, there will likely be a knock at your door any minute since you took a PHOTO of yourself breaking the law. Think about it, and maybe just settle for a chest bump next time.
And since your Mayor is going to have a celebration parade despite the city's hurting economy, that ought to be a good time. Normal people: bring your helmets and flame retardant outfits.