Tuesday, May 25, 2010

To meat or not to meat, that is the question.

First, did you miss yesterday's post? Check out the amazing art giveaway below. 
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I went to a fully stocked brunch hosted by an acquaintance recently. Several of her neighbors attended as well. She loves to cook so it was a full menu representing all the food groups. And of course, you know I brought baked goods galore. Because baked goods should be their own food group. During brunch, I helped her make some turkey sausage and offered it to the many guests seated at their large dining room table. As I turned to one of her neighbors and asked, "Turkey sausage, C?" He recoiled. 

A simple "no, thanks" would not work? You had to leap back like I was donned in a hazmat suit offering you a cup of napalm? In his  recoil, he said, " I am a vegan." But he said it less like casual Oh, by the way and more like WHAT THE F___ ARE YOU THINKING OFFERING ME THAT!?!?!

Now, I am not savvy into all of the levels of vegetarianism but I do know several. As you know, vegetarianism is the practice of following a diet based on plant-based foods. For a little knowledge pool, I also clarified that a vegetarian does not eat meat, game, poultry, fish, crustacea, shellfish, or products of animal slaughter such as animal-derived gelatin and rennet. There are a number of vegetarian diets. A lacto-vegetarian diet includes dairy products but excludes eggs, an ovo-vegetarian diet includes eggs but not dairy products, and a lacto-ovo vegetarian diet includes both eggs and dairy products. A vegan diet excludes all animal products, including dairy products, eggs, and honey.


Now, we know plenty of vegetarians and I myself am not necessarily down with the red meat. And of all the vegetarians I know, I dont know any of them who say it but don't live it. 

Why was his comment even of interest to me? Because as he dry heaved over the turkey sausage, he was delightfully chomping away on an omelet. Not an omelet made of daisy petals  and angel kisses either. An EGG omelet.

Since I didn't know him, I declined an opportunity to be Jordan Snarks and tell him that I am quite confident vegans don't eat eggs but luckily, another neighbor chimed right in with my exact sentiment.

His response: Well, I am a vegan most of the  time.
Her response: Oh, I know that type of vegetarian. The one that eats meat.
My thought: I think that is also called vacillaterianism. 

60 comments:

Mommakin said...

When my youngest became a vegetarian (and NEVER vascillated - sobbed for a day when she realized she'd eaten flan and flan is made from gelatin...) we told her that we would be supportive but that she was NEVER to be obnoxious, preachy or judgmental about it. It's been almost two years, and to the best of my knowledge she has never been one of those things. I told her those were the kind of people that give vegetarians a bad name.

His momma didn't raise him right.

ajm said...

Agree -- if you eat meat, you are not a vegetarian, and if you eat eggs, you are not a vegan! And THOSE defensive vegetarians are the ones that make me a little crazy (as a vegetarian myself). No need to be rude. Just decline the turkey.

Rachel said...

Wow, interesting post. I call myself a vegetarian to make things easier but really I just don't eat mammal-meat, meaning that I will have small amounts of organic, free range dairy and eggs, and once in a while I will have shellfish. No chicken, pork or beef. I tried to eat a vegan diet, it lasted for 3 months. But in my experience, people who call themselves vegans are very proud of the title, and do not ever waver back and forth. It isn't just a food choice, it's no leather, fur, anything. And since I do wear leather I made sure not to call myself a vegan during those three months.. I simply said I was eating a vegan diet.

I would have laughed an obnoxious laugh when I saw him eating the eggs.

The Girl said...

How delightful an omlette made of daisy petals and angel kisses would be. I wonder if there's a recipe somewhere...

My name is PJ. said...

'Vacillatarianism' - MWAHAHAHAHA!

Most excellent!

I find if I don't tell people they're eating 'turkey' burgers or sausage or chili or meatloaf, they don't usually notice.

sweethomeamy said...

Hahaha, I would have had to restrain myself from talking about how much I love steak...what a weirdo.

Stopping by from SITS! :-)

TKW said...

What a tool. I'm glad someone chimed in about the eggs...let no obnoxious dork go uncorrected.

Pesto Sauce said...

Hey I never knew so many types of veggies. For me not eating meat is being vegetarian

Eric said...

'Well, I am a vegan most of the time.'

- but you sir, are a jackass all of the time.


Why does my little sister have to be a vegi-nazi also? No matter how much I try to talk with her about it, I can't seem to make her less passive-aggressively annoying about it all.

brainella said...

Pompous ass-munch. Yup. Know them lots.

One of my student assistants at Emory was the PETA chapter president. She used to take off her Birkenstock sandals and put on canvas shoes to go to her meetings so no one would see her wearing leather. Yeah. Love the hypocrisy.

Intense Guy said...

Awww...it would be good for you to go all Jordan Snarks now and then for your own mental health.

:)

I always have to bring up how I can hear the plants screaming when they get harvested, and how the poor little birdies lose their homes when someone cuts down their nest-tree to drag it inside for Christmas.... complete with hand-wringing and sobs... oooooh those poor, poor birdies...!

AmyLK said...

Good thing someone reminded him about the eggs! That would have been me!

The Boob Nazi said...

hahaha what an a-hole

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

I have only met 1 vegetarian who wasn't a complete Ahole.

The 1 who is normal and nice eats bacon when she visits me. She tells me she dreams of my slab bacon. That cracks me up. She lives on the west coast and visits every couple of years. She calls it her bacon visit. Otherwise she is a complete vegan. sort of like "a little bit pregnant" isn't it?

Mighty M said...

Haha. Maybe he should bring his Vegan handbook next time he is at a brunch.

I have pretty much stopped eating meat and am contemplating dairy. But if I do quit, it will be 100%.

Well, at least MOST of the time. :)

jules said...

An "angel kiss" omelet. Ha ha. I'm glad somebody called that guy out. What a hypocrite!

MommyLovesStilettos said...

I could never go vegan. I love dairy products. LOL (My fat ass totally shows that! haha)

I was a vegetarian for almost two years. I'm not all crazy about "saving the animals". I just didn't want to eat meat with a bunch of hormones and crazy shit packed into it...so instead of trying to find it without - I'm lazy and I stopped eating meat. Eventually I got pretty sick, because I was having a hard time getting enough protein. I started eating meat again, and will probably never stop cause that was a scary experience for me.

I would NEVER be rude and make a big ordeal out of someone offering me any kind of meat when I was vegetarian...NEVER. To each his own. Different strokes for different folks! People like that totally chap my ass and the fact that he was eating an egg omelet means he is a douchecanoe. Amen.

leigh said...

That guy is an ass. He should have had an ass omelet. I just made that up, I don't think that you can actually eat a donkey. I wonder if he is THAT kind of vegan?

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

A douchecanoe (that's just funny).
I think I've met this person before.

Meanwhile, I'm at home trying to figure out how to tell my child that she's not a vegetarian. She's 13 years old, she doesn't have a clue what she is, she just needs to go outside and play.

Erin said...

Since Earth Day this year when I watched Food, Inc. for the first time, I have not eaten meat, chicken, pork, turkey, or anything like that. Fish is the exception. I don't know if it will stick, but I'm working hard and would like to. For now, I can't live without my dairy, although I am shopping at Whole Foods and Farmers' Markets....

It's kinda how I feel about Jews who keep kosher, but then nosh on a cheeseburger when they go out. They keep kosher at home, but not when they go out. So what's the point?

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

I respect vegetarians choice to not eat meat but hate when they try to make me feel bad for choosing to eat it.

foxy said...

Man, I hate people like that. To each their own, I guess, but you really don't have to be such an ass about it? AND THEN to be all breaking his own rules?? What an idiot.

Herding Cats said...

I'm totally okay and happy for vegetarians and vegans (and I have tons of friends that practice that diet). However, being condescending, rude, or even ignorant about it is just annoying!

Allyson & Jere said...

That is a seriously priceless exchange. And your commentary on it, even BETTER! I very rarely eat red meat 'cause i just don't like it. But, I can honestly say, i could never do the vegan, or vegitarian thing. I like me some chicken, pork and turkey too much. Plus, i am TOTALLY in love with all things dairy.

I do have some vegan friends, and I do mean VEGAN and they're really awesome. Not in your face rude about it. Just sayin...they do exist.

Ed said...

I'm a Vagitarian.

It's not fattening.

Laoch of Chicago said...

Being the most suggestible man in the universe it made me immediately want to go for Polish sausage.

Babes Mami said...

My brother is vegan and while that's great for him, I like cheese and eggs. He gives me disgusted looks sometimes and I just want to hit him. I know that it isn't all vegans but my brother has become angry and very 'what the f are you thinking' (like that guy) since the change.

SmartBear said...

Oh! This makes me nuts!(wait...do vegans eat nuts?) I'm all for people choosing their own diets, but I hate having to accomodate EVERYTHING. One of my closest friends is a true vegan. She has called a few people out in public when they get all judgemental and freakish about it. She has always told me that this is her choice and it shouldn't be anyone else's burden....even if all I had to offer her at a dinner party is salad and couscous. She's gracious about it.

Scraps said...

I did the whole no red meat or pork thing for most of high school--drove Mom up the wall (and she never did cotton to turkey in her spaghetti sauce). So when my stepson decided to go veggie in high school, I was patient and encouraging, even making component meals and buying him a tofurky loaf for Thanksgiving.

Then, of course, he decided all he wanted to eat were faux-chicken nuggets, french bread and energy drinks. Not exactly a balanced diet, there.

But your experience reminds me of a dinner party scene from Coupling (the original, British version) where the vapid Jane is all 'oh, I'm a vegetarian, too' but, of course hasn't the foggiest idea what it means. To her it was more of a spiritual thing, I believe, and had no problem eating meat.

Truth is stranger than fiction, no?

Myya said...

Guess who isn't getting invited next time... that guy sounds like an ass!

Elle said...

"Vacillatarianism" is just plain awesome.

I would've been forced to say something like, "Huh! I find it fascinating that your being a giant doucheslush hasn't rinsed away any of that prententious overreacting."

Kristina P. said...

And these are the kinds of guys that give vegans a bad name.

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

*snort* at Ed!!
<><

M-Cat said...

He didn't need to be so obnoxious and then eating the omelet only provided more ammo to mock him with.

I could never go vegetarian or any form of it.

"Gimme some of that MEAT, and don't get cheap on me!"

Salt said...

I was under the impression that baked good WERE their own food group!

Neighbor Sometimes-Vegan is a moron. Either that or he's not entirely sure what a vegan is. But more likely he likes to use that as a way to draw attention to himself.

Unfortunately I know someone else like that.

Holly said...

I just learned so much about the branches of vegetarianism that I never knew existed. And the situation with homeboy sounds quite frustrating. Props to you for resisting the urge to totally put him in his place!

Dumblond said...

What a d-bag.
How about a simple "no-thanks"? Why the smug mug? I hate people like that, vegans or not. I need a smug smack license. I have the right to smack your smug mug. That would be awesome...

MommaAmma said...

So how do I get on this daisy petal and angel kiss diet? Sounds sublime!

You are too witty! Love it. I'm not sure what type of law you practice but I would pay good money to sit in on one of your depositions (you know, if you are that type of attorney)!

shortmama said...

How can you be a part time vegan? I mean generally you are vegan because you dont like the whole killing and eating of animals and their products thing right? So sometimes its ok???? I dont get it. Why not just say I dont eat meat often or I try not to consume it in excess? Damn confused plant eating wannabes

Aging Mommy said...

Oh my, if you are Vegan then fine, but either be one or not, you cannot be a Vegan some of the time, same way you can't be a virgin some of the time either :-)

Tiffany said...

Awesome response...I'm so glad someone called him out on it...especially since he was being such a snob!

Janet said...

vacillaterianism--LOVE IT!

Honestly, I think that's what I am. But at least I know it, and I do not get preachy to anyone about anything they eat or ask me to eat.

Ellen said...

This is awesome! I could never be a vegan because I love my eggs way too much. Give me a side of turkey sausage and I'm good to GO ;)

http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/

Cara Smith said...

WOW! My little sis can be like that sometimes. When she got into college she joined peta a became a vegitarian for all of 5 minutes. Even sent out a Thankgsgiving text saying happy Tofurkey Day.

My husband response was the pilgrims and Indians ate meat. So did Jesus, so I get to too!

Audreya said...

I laughed when you said "a simple no will do" because I just posted a blog a few days ago about the same sort of thing... overreacting to basic questions... and called it 'A simple yes will do'.

Then I REALLY laughed at "Vacillatarianism" So true!! I eat very little meat, so, if asked, I just say "I eat very little meat". It seems a lot simpler than trying to wade through the various titles... and then explain why I do or don't eat certain things. Some people...

J.J. said...

Haha! Good on the neighbor for calling him out!

I know a guy with an allergy to dairy. I asked his girlfriend why she doesn't eat it anymore and she said, "J can't eat it."

I replied, "So, what? He sucks on your tongue hard enough to get the remnants of cheese left on yours after you eat it?"

She didn't think that was funny.

Writing Without Periods! said...

I'd rather be stuck in an elevator for 12 hours with anyone but a non-meat eater...holy crap SOME act like they invented eating and if you eat meat you're Satan!
Mary

Jen said...

Excellent post! And the comments are just as worthy :) Good for you for holding your tongue, and even better that someone else called him out for you! Now I'm going to copy & print your Brownie and Peanut Butter Cup recipes. Because clearly you have something against me losing the 6 lbs I'm sitting on ;)

Elz said...

Ha! I don't think I would have been able to hold my tongue on that one.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

"Vacillaterianism"...priceless! And I'm glad someone called him out on it - he apparently doesn't know what he is. Be we do... ;)

Julie at MDMA said...

My sister is a vegan/vegetarian/whateva (as long as wine is vegan, she's fine!) and going to a restaurant with her is pure hell. The amount of questions she asks is INSANE. I always wish the server would just say, "do you want to come back and cook dinner for yourself?"

Jesus! It's not a peanut allergy! You're not going to die!

Amazing you could hold your tongue. I'd be tempted to dump the whole plate of plutonium in his lap by "mistake."

Lauren said...

It's guys like that who make the rest of us look like jerks. He should call himself a vegetarian. And it doesn't do anyone any good if he acts judgmental and then chows into a plateful of eggs. What a douchelord.

Jennifer said...

I see no problem with being a vegetarian most of the time and then splurging. Kind of like being on a diet to lose weight but then every now and then having a bit of cake. It's a treat, a rarity. It's your choice what you eat. I don't think you have to commit 100% or else. Who is everyone else, the food police? It doesn't negate the point of being a vegetarian (of which there could be many reasons), like reducing our draw of non-sustainable resources, eating lower on the food chain to reduce toxins from biomagnification, saving lots of mistreated animals, etc. However, that being said, the guy didn't have to be an asshat. Like you were the jerk for offering him something he didn't want? THAT is the ridiculous part. Seriously, a simple "no thanks" was sufficient. Who cares if he's vegan or sometimes-vegan, or simply a turkey sausage hater. I hate people who think that the entire planet is here to serve them. JennyMac, you are such a kind person to pass up the opportunity to point out his doucheyness. Not sure I would have.

The Random Blogette said...

I so agree with Erin! What is the point if you are not going to live the full lifestyle. I could never do it myself because I love chicken and bacon too much!

Oh and BTW..."Jordan Snarks" LOL! You my dear are truly awesome!

carma said...

what a self-righteous turd ;-) I'm a vegetarian - but not a vegan and I sure as heck don't bring this up or to convince other people that they need to become vegetarians...to each his own - and the whole gelatin thing is kinda freaky - but tempting when it is in Jello format :D

Just Breathe said...

It sounds like something my brother would say. He is not a vegan or a vegetarian but sometimes it seems like he says things that he really know nothing about. If this guy was a Vegan he would not be eating eggs!! My daughter stopped eating meat about a year ago. (she is 29) She doesn't like to be called a vegetarian at all, she just doesn't eat animals :)

secret agent woman said...

When I was in grad school (and still eating meat) a classmate mentioned that he was "mostly a vegetarian." I asked what that meant and he said, "Well, I only eat meat maybe once a day." I said, ""Hell, I'm not a vegetarian at all but I don't even eat meat every day!" I hate when people claim to be something they are not. That said, I am a pesca-vegetarian, meaning I eat seafood but not mammal or bird. But I just politely say "no, thank you" when offered meat.

Vivienne said...

What a douche.

BTW, I totally would've pointed out his hypocrisy. And would've told him he was a "vacillaterian."

Clemson Girl said...

If you're going to claim to be something you either are or you aren't. It's like saying "I'm a wife most of the time." That doesn't go over too well either...

Mom in High Heels said...

OMG, that is hilarious. Vegans don't eat eggs. And I'm afraid I would have had to point that out. Sweetly, of course, but still, I'd have said something.
I'm what my dad refers to as a half-assed vegetarian. I don't eat anything with 4 feet, but will on occasion eat chicken or turkey (though I'm not a fan). I never, ever waiver on the 4 footed animal think though because I have texture issues. Oh, and ostrich is too much like red meat texture for me. Ick. What would I be called?