As I see our son grow, I feel that same evolution. For so long I am his favorite person. Then one day with no precaution, I am not. Or he needs me for everything, until he doesn't and simply says, " I can do it by myself." We want that but seem a bit ill-prepared when it actually happens. I want to ebb and flow with him. But be a leader, set good examples. And not wince when he doesn't want to know what I think. Be someone he can respect. And trust. And one day he may look at us and think, he does want to be just like us. And when he doesn't want to be just like us, be ok with that too. What I hope we avoid is raising our biggest critic. We all go through our own evolution in which we traverse the distance between baby and adult by needing no one more than our parent or guide so feeling so wise and established we need no one less. MiniMac told me the other night, " I do not have to do what you tell me to do." My response, "That is HILARIOUS. And incorrect." It is merely a test of his own ability to stretch. And at least for now we can absorb those comments with humor and redirect. But the biggest thing I have learned from becoming a Mom is wow, we are always learning. A woman I really respect told me yesterday that I am one of the best Moms she knows. It made my heart sing a bit. While it may not be accurate, it is the job at which I strive to be the best. And while it is the hardest job I will ever have, it certainly is the best.
I hope everyone of our Mother's or grandmothers or guides feels the very same way when they think about us. We might not be perfect. We have certainly hurt their feelings, been disrespectful on occasion, and in some cases been disappointing because we were selfish, or bratty because we felt they didn't understand us at all. Or perhaps understood us too well. We have all said an ugly thing stemmed from frustration. We didn't mean it but the sting still comes. Or we have sometimes scared them when we were reckless with ourselves. Or with their love. But I hope those moments are the minority. And the rest are filled with all the ways we made them glad our lives connected the way they did, and brought value, and laughter and moments that no two other people could possibly create.
And tonight, while I am feeling happy of heart. And poetic in my mind, I will also add that it is pretty bad ass when your husband and son bring this home for Mother's Day: The Macs have gone Mac!
I feel like I have turned a significant high-tech corner. MiniMac (and his Daddy) certainly know how to hook a girl up. The Macs have gone Mac! I have much to learn as a long-term PC user but I am thrilled about it! Any tips you have, share them.
Have a fabulous Monday.