Unless your wife starts a blog, and then, well, best of luck shielding your antics from the world.
Greetings from the Emerald City. Ahhh. My stomping grounds. It is a tremendously good feeling to be in my hometown where we will enjoy the next 9 days.
This is a photo I took a few years ago from one of the many parks in the city. Picture perfect, I'd say.
This is my first bi-coastal blogging. While I am cramming in as many family/friends/fun things as possible, I am a Black Belt in Multi-tasking. Even my amazing Aunt who is 70+ years old asked, "You will still be posting to your blog while you are here, right?"
Oui.
And I would miss you all too much to not "see" you for a week. And I was on a wee bit of withdrawal yesterday because I had zero time with all the traveling to read any blogs. My comments will be lighter this next week, but I will be popping in and out when I can. And I am off to Starbucks soon to pick up the gift card I will bestow upon someone tomorrow!
Tonight, is the kick off of my three-day 20 year high school reunion. One of my friends asked if I was joking, before adding, even Truman Capote knew when to draw the line.
I have kept in great touch with friends from childhood and look so forward to seeing them.
I am also speaking at tomorrow night's formal fete. I promise I won't start off with ....this one time, at band camp. I will mostly make mockery of our hideous hair, sassy large fringe scarves we wore, and of course, our inability to properly break dance.
While I am at the "OMG..do you remember when..." fest tonight sans spouses, my Husband has the option of going out with my little brother.
Days ago, while I chatted with my little brother, HiPie, regarding plans for our visit, one of said plans includes JohnnyMac staying at their house to catch an early tee time one morning. JohnnyMac said that staying at their house will certainly assure he is not in bed early, and not in any shape to play golf early in the am. HiPie swore restraint and good behavior.
I said, oh, that's a precious little lie.
Let me explain.
Two years ago, during a summer visit, we enjoyed a dinner out with HiPie, The RevDoc (my BIL) and some other friends. The boys order the drinks. And keep ordering drinks. Everyone appears oh so very thirsty. After a luxurious 2 hour dinner, we went to a joint that plays karoaoke. Warm it up Chris? I'm about to....
Of course, very soon, our friend CapitolHill and I are doing a perfect job singing Push It. I can't get enough of the yo yo yo yo baby pop.
Some girls get up and sing Bon Jovi. JohnnyMac is a fan of Bon Jovi. He follows them only to bop around behind them like a back up dancer. Not really a back up dancer...more like a highly springy toy bobbing up and down with his hands in the air. Not hands in the air Ludacris style either. His hands in the air was a bit more stick 'em up style.
And my Hub doesn't dance. This should have been a warning sign.
Later, as I am getting ready to sing my favorite Janis Joplin song, Me and Bobby McGee, JohnnyMac hears someone singing Poison. He then proceeds to begin a wobbly ascent up on top of a table to dance. Ummmm, time out on the field. I knew he had to be w-a-s-t-e-d to even attempt such an act.
I then spy him saunter over to the bar with our pals as shots are being purchased and consumed. Oh, this is going to end poorly, I think. I then recognize JohnnyMac's sloppy face. I see it rarely, but when I do, I pay attention. HiPie and I leave him at the bar to go fetch a cab and my parting words to our friends:
"Free neutering for the next one who buys him a shot."
We get in the cab, and aww, night night JohnnyMac. We arrive at my little brother's and JohnnyMac just can't quite wake up. Ever hoisted a full grown man dipped in wasted and rolled in sleepy out of a cab? Oh, its big fun.
The next morning, he wakes up hangover free, because he happens to have DNA that repels hangovers. I did happily show him the pics of him "sleeping" in the cab. Or, as I like to call it "passed out." And he passed out with one eye open which makes for awesome photographs. Arrgghhhh....
Of course, as soon as I see HiPie, who was the conductor of that train, I ask him WTF happened with the sudden crazy booze blanket JohnnyMac got wrapped in. And I meant prior to shots being served. His response, "Oh, we had been ordering him doubles all night. Is that wrong?"If it was wrong, apparently JohnnyMac wanted not to be right. And I did get a small preview of his dance move arsenal, which he has yet to live down.
Hence his statement that going out with my little brother will not improve either his odds of getting up on time for early golf OR his actual golf game.
And why I don't believe any of those innocent little promises my little brother wants to make.
But, then again, it could be me who is a spinning disco ball of wasted come shut eye time tonight so I better not throw stones. But at least I will have my fabulous dance moves. And even if I get a bit sideways tonight with my old friends, my secrets are safe because my husband doesn't write a blog.
