Thursday, December 16, 2010

Apparently, your snow lady better not be a hussy

It is officially cold. Everywhere, including Georgia. We were sprinkled with approximately 200 flakes of snow. And then freezing rain last night caused more than 1000 accidents in a very short time frame. We do not know how to do cold, let's be honest. However, two years ago we did have snow which provided the opportunity for us to demonstrate something essential to our son: a snowball fight. It was short lived but everyone can have fun in the snow. Unless you are a dirty little snow lady. OR you are not dirty at all but your neighbors are either super conservative or they simply suck.

In New Jersey, Eliza Gonzales and her 21 year old daughter and 12 year old son created a tribute that puts your fat round balled snowman to shame. They created a Venus de Milo.


Until the local police department was called. And an officer was dispatched. And told them to cover up her snowy lady bits. You know, the fake lady bits that don't actually look like lady bits at all. Yes, those snowy lady bits. So they found a bikini and a sarong for their creation.

I understand the need to protect children from certain imagery but this seems like a big white stretch to me. Perhaps I am too liberal. 

Said Gonzalez "[She is] curvaceous, bodacious and booty-licious,"  And you have to love a Mom who not only can make the world's best snow art but also one who knows the word booty-licious.  She also knows the word douchelicious because that word applies to the tattler.

55 comments:

Sarah said...

I am so incredibly impressed. I can't make a snowman to save my life, and there are people out there that can do this? Rock on.

Bird Shit and Baby Caca said...

People need to relax! That snow art was fabulous! LOL

DeNae said...

You do have to wonder about some people. Honestly, I think it's more suggestive with the clothes on.

secret agent woman said...

If it had been obscene, that might have made sense, but it's a recreation of classical art! And in fact, looks more suggestive with the clothing.

A Year on the Grill said...

well, thank goodness there were no crimes to investigate and the police had time to do important stuff

Simply Suthern said...

Are you kidding me??
That green top and blue sarong do not go together. Where are the fashion police?

ellen abbott said...

they should have just used pasties and a leaf.

Eva Gallant said...

that is pretty sad; they did such a nice job!

Coffee Please!?! said...

funny! i'm in NJ and didn't hear about this! I am doing a book giveaway from a GA author - thought maybe you'd be interested .. check it out ... http://needcoffeeplease.blogspot.com
(thanks!)

C.J. said...

people who tattle, ewwwwwwww, bunch of idle idiots! Personally, I think the sculptured one is lovely. Merry Christmas to you and yours, I am off to GA on Sunday for Christmas at my daughters.

foxy said...

Well now, that is just ridiculous! I love their creativity!! I have to say, though, I'm not really surprised that some disgruntled SCROOGE called them in. People complain about freaking everything these days.

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Some people get jammed up about silly things. The snow women is fabulous.

Kristi Faith said...

freakin'. hilarious!

Love this post, thanks for sharing!!

Eric said...

It's hard enough to render accurate form in clay, but snow? These people are good.

Yeah, at first, the over-censorship thing sometimes makes me think we are on a hellish expressway to theocracy in the US. But then, I realize it's just that the police in those instances are not using sound judgement. Book burnings and women in burkas are next?

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Perhaps I am too liberal, you say.

Perhaps most people are just idiots. Venus de Milo is art. There are no lady bits showing. Hell turn on TV and you'll see much more than young people are watching!

Add this to my list of why I am misanthropic these days.

jules said...

The original is art, and so is hers! I can't believe they made her cover it up! Ridiculous!

singedwingangel said...

Seriously?? Do people have nothing better to do with their time? I think she did an awesome job *way better then I could do*

Kristina P. said...

People suck.

Bouncin' Barb said...

Goes to show you...us Jersey Girls know fine art when they see it! I can't believe someone actually called the police.

Tricia said...

crazy

Anonymous said...

Yummy !!

Big Fat Gini said...

Well, that's certainly a lot better thank the KKK snowman in Idaho (Iowa?) a few weeks ago. And across from a school with a noose around it's neck to boot!

Some people need to relax. It must be nice to have so little to worry about that they need to harass their neighbors over something so silly.

As a side note, it's frustrating to me when people use the term "conservative" in such a negative context. I may vote Republican, but I'm no John Ashcroft.

Drew said...

Wow! That is seriously impressive!

If I was the police officer who got that call I'd have told the tattler to stuff it and go have some egg nog.

M-Cat said...

Raising boys, we never had normal snowmen. I just would hide in the house and pretend I didn't notice.

And the neighbor whose reindeer always ended up in inappropriate poses in the morning? I have no idea about those.....

Serio - my boys made my hair gray

KittyCat said...

First I have to say that is very impressive that they made one. 2nd What the hell? SOmeone has too much freakin time on their hands to call the cops.
What is wrong with ppl now a days.
Dumbasses.

Great post!

Pricilla said...

This is the same mentality that put the fig leaf on David....

hotpants™ said...

The snow lady didn't have nipples so they should have been good. You see no worse on a cartoon or on a naked mannequin in the store.

Mommy Lisa said...

I totally agree its more suggestive with the bikini and saraong than naked snow.

Mommy Lisa said...

I wonder what that tattler would have thought about the giant fallus that was *ahem* erected on the porch steps of my sorority house by our neighboring frat?

Ed said...

That's HOT!

Gives me a North Pole in my snowsuit.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Heavens! Won't someone think of the children? The precious little snowflakes might learn that people don't actually look like Barbie dolls under their clothes then where would be be? With a revolution on our hands.

Seriously? It's like the other day I read about 11 things Walmart have banned in their time and one was a t-shirt that said "Some day a woman will be president". Enough people complained about that sentiment to get Walmart to ban it. What the EFF?

Let the lady have her excellent snow art. It doesn't even have NIPPLES or a cooji-cleavage for god's sake.

Kat said...

First off, I can't believe how incredibly talented these people are. That is truly amazing work. And secondly, I think the tattler was afraid that someone in their household might get their tongue stuck (a la A Christmas Story), and therefore decided to head off any ensuing scandal at the pass. Just a thought... Kat

B.o.B. said...

Is it just me or does it actually look trashy in the bikini? It went from art to street ho. Tsk tsk tsk.

A little culture never hurt anyone...

undomestic chica said...

That's horrible! Is it wrong that I would have wanted to go make another one in the neighbor's yard overnight? It's not suggestive in any way and looks way sexier with the additions.

Babes Mami said...

The clothes def make it more sexy!

I love 'sprinkled with apprx 200 flakes of snow'. As your state neighbor I know how crazy everyone gets at the thought of snow!

K A B L O O E Y said...

Buncha maroons, I tell ya.

injaynesworld said...

People can be such idiots. What a cool Mom. No pun intended.

Allyson & Jere said...

Ummmm, I beg to differ. Officially cold everywhere BUT sunny ol' Arizona, where we've been lounging in shorts and t-shirts. UGH! I'd prefer a little chill. But whatevs.

I love more than anything that you used the word douchealicious! I shall add it to my repatoire, as I love, LOVE to use the word douche. It's just so fantastically descriptive.

Heather Pranitis said...

Very creative and artistic. And sometimes people just need to MYOB - I guess that didn't happen in this case. I like it and it would not have bothered me.

Myya said...

Are you kidding me! Some people have to always bitch about something. That looked awesome, some major snow-crafting skills came out to play with that sculpture.

Inge' said...

Guess I have been a perv since birth. When I was younger, some girlfriends and I decided to build a snowman. This turned into a snow woman complete with all the lady bits and we even used grass for authenticity! She stood on the side yard facing the street for several days and no cops were called.

Course I was probably high at the time so you have to factor that in!

Have a great Christmas!

Jane said...

Hmmm. I remember a Thanksgiving in Wisconsin about 20 years ago, where we were blasted with snow. Our "after the feast" entertainment was to build an anatomically-correct snowman. He was a very happy snowman if you get my drift. I will never forget watching my 11-year-old niece taking two snowballs and...well, you get the picture.

af1blog said...

Great post and I love the picture. Excellent art. I really cannot believe how stupid some people can be, but then there are insecure jerks everywhere I suppose, aren't there?

In my opinion, if someone finds that offensive, then they should rush out and find themselves a shrink, because they have a real serious problem!

Incidentally, is it just me, or is the version with the bikini bra and sarong closer to being sexy?

bluzdude said...

If I were her, I'd be sorely tempted to make a 2nd snow sculpture; one so graphic and immodest that it would put poor Ms. de Milo to shame...

Or, maybe just carve the text of the First Amendment into the snow.

Harrumph.

vanilla said...

Nice jobs, beautifully done, both the original art and the reporting here. The needlenose neighbor and the modesty police, not so much.

We have a small replica of Rodin's "The Kiss" which we are compelled to put in the closet when certain visitors are expected.
(Kidding. It's always on display.)

Intense Guy said...

Whoever filed the complaint sucks.

South Florida Lawyers said...

That's pretty impressive, how pointless to force them to cover it up.

Shanna said...

the snow art is amazing. The person who called the police is a fool.

Mom in High Heels said...

That is amazing. This is one of the things I dislike about being an American though. Heaven forbid a child see a naked snow breast.

Anonymous said...

Really? Who is so ridiculous to call the police department over a snow sculpture. Oh, someone in NJ.

Sarah at The Stroller Ballet said...

Oh my goodness. Don't want to be crude, but those neighbors need to remove the sticks from their rear ends. Enough said.

MommaAmma said...

I hope she creates the Statue of David next.

There's a very good chance that neighbor had no idea this was art. If it was a naked Snooky or James Gandolfini they'd be fine.

Aunt Juicebox said...

I'd have made her some pasties.

Cathi said...

That is a work of art!!! :) xxoo

Rubes said...

douchelicious